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| 1. Vampire's Seduction Director: John Bacchus | |
![]() | list price: $19.98
our price: $19.98 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B00004W5TR Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 63425 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (11)
The plot of this movie is something about a vampire - played for laughs by a really cute Tina Krause, who shows a flair for comedy - named Dracoola, who needs lesbians (and don't they all) and a nerdy loser who she recruits to find some for her. But - and who could have seen this plot twist - he's a Van Helsing! Yes, from the famous vampire-killer lineage. If you can get through the over-long sex scenes (I never thought I'd be saying THAT), this movie is actually pretty funny. The Van Helsing character - played very well by John Paul Fedele and is a kind of cross between Woody Allen and Jerry Lewis' Nutty Professor - has some very funny lines. The script might have been written that way, but he delivers his lines so smoothly that they appear to be ad libbed. I really think this guy shows some talent - but who the hell am I! Also, Zack Snygg (Blood, Bullets and Buffoons) and Debbie Rochon (not enough room to list everything) are very good in their limited screen time. In addition to the comedic elements and the sex (that ever-elusive lesbian vampire sex), there are some unintentionally funny moments also. A young woman goes to a psychotherapist because she is having problems with her boyfriend. She tells the doctor (played by Paige Turner - another great name) that she doesn't feel pretty anymore. Well, there's good reason for that - she's not. But she and the good doctor proceed to "do it" in her office (I've never seen so many women who don't wear underwear) until the pizza boy comes. Then it's something straight out of an old xxx movie - the doctor asks him if he wants cash for the pizza or could she offer him "one of these!" I think you get the picture. The two women and the pizza boy then experience prolonged periods of "getting' it on." Another scene that I found humorous - but I don't know if anyone else will - is a scene in which a supposed-teenage girl is having a friend sleep over at her house. They are talking about boys and the girl's mother enters the room. First of all, the "mother" looks younger than both of the "girls." Then, after setting up the fact that these girls are supposed to be about 14 or 15 years old and virginal, the "mother" proceeds to tell them that boys can be bad and they should kiss each other to see what it's like. The "mother" eventually joins in and when one of the "girls" slips out of her nightie, she has pierced nipples and tattoos. The other "girl" also has tattoos, as well as the "mot her." I don't know, but I found that humorous - maybe it's just me. At the end, the Van Helsing character rids the world of Dracoola in a way that only a movie of this caliber could get away with. Sure, there are certain aspects that scream "crap" - such as the fact that you know Tina's scenes were shot in one day on her lunch break from her real job and edited in later - but it doesn't make any difference. Taken at face value, The Vampire's Seduction is a fun way to kill an hour and a half (including the out-takes after the movie).
I had already decided, after seeing other John Bacchus lemons, not to buy any more of his films. I didn't know that this one was from his stable. They are so formulaic. Excepting as mentioned earlier, this has so little vampirism. It involves primarily a rather ugly and seemingly retarded man spying on a lot of other people having sex. This man just walks into some girls apartment and without her noticing, stands in the bathroom door as she soaps herself. He is bitten once on the arm (that's the extent of the vampirism), and then goes and watches more people. There's the typical John Bacchus feature; a woman in bath/shower soaping herself. Thus the sex scenes aren't really connected to anything. Tina Krause stands outside in the dark waiting for him to report back. She dances around topless a bit, but has very little else to do in this film other then to die pointlessly at the end, having had a few scenes dancing, and being very bored. Even the DVD bonus material (on the flip-side of the disc) is also meaningless as we see Misty Mundae in a long sequence not used in the film "An Erotic Vampire in Paris" which again features a bath scene. She bathes, as the she-Vampire comes in. The she-Vampire spends a long time brushing her hair before getting in the bath too. There's a little bit of breast-fondling, but no vampirism. More shots from some other film are used including a woman standing in front of a window and rubbing herself. There was no point to this either. If you enjoy John Bacchus films you are the most easy to please person on the planet. He enjoys showing women (with inflated breasts) doing lots of dancing and prancing about, and very mild sex scenes, varied only by someone pretending to be a vampire or a demon. And of course, there's got to be a scene showing someone washing herself. It's like a moving version of a ... spread (big boobs, high-heels, big hair).
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| 2. Gladiator Eroticus Director: John Bacchus | |
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Reviews (11)
Misty Mundae saves this movie from complete failure. She plays the sister of the new emperor, and he keeps her close to his side for the first two-thirds of the film. Once she finally has a chance to engage in the gladiator-like activities taking Rome by storm, the movie becomes much better. This is actually a rather large-scale project for the Seduction Cinema folks; all this really means is that there are more actors than usual included in the cast and that the whole Roman army, instead of numbering a handful of soldiers, seems to consist of about twenty people. This is unquestionably a bare-bones sort of production. Almost all of the action takes place out in the open, and computer-generated Roman-looking buildings are supposed to make us envision Rome itself as the setting. The plot itself pretty much stinks, coming pretty close to giving Mistress Frankenstein a run for its money in terms of its rottenness. Bacchus got some of his jollies with the idea of a "vomitorium" this time around, and this does not help his cause. One thing about this film particularly galls me, though. The voices of Darian Caine and Jade DuBoir are dubbed over with some he-man-sounding female voices which sound utterly ridiculous. I really can't recommend this film to anyone besides Misty Mundae fans; she is much too good for a movie this ridiculous.
This is a VERY low-budget movie. It's like a group of friends got together to have some fun acting the plot out. I wasn't expecting anything here. I was assuming it would be something mindless. It turned out not to be totally mindless. The humor is extremely silly - beyond what you might in Airplane! or Naked Gun. There are a few good moments which I don't think I should state in a place which can be viewed by all ages. I'm tempted to make comparisons with the director Ed Wood, but that could be a little misleading since he never did porn. There is plenty of overacting and bad dialogue. ...but it's fun. Even with the bad jokes, there is a plot here. The weapons are plastic toys. The main female gladiator fights don't really involve weapons. Two women approach each other and then they quickly touch each other in a sexual manner or move their tongues rapidly. Most of the fights are orgies - all girls. No men involved. There are a few traditional gladiator type fights, but they're just there to move the story along. I could have done without the vomit scene. For me, the movie was enjoyable, but not a classic. I simply viewed it as a Gladiator spoof with some sex added in. I liked it because I studied Latin and Roman culture in college, and it was neat to see this type of a production on that subject. ...even if it may not be 100% (or even 40%) historically accurate. There is a nice interview with Misty Mundae included. ...a normal interview. Just comments about her daily routine and a few things about the production.
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| 3. Erotic Survivor Director: John Bacchus | |
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our price: $14.98 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B000055ZLB Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 59210 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (7)
The erotic segments of the movie aren't bad, but they're not what I would call sizzling either. Fans of both Darian Caine and Misty Mundae should not work themselves into a frenzy because there is no intense interaction between the two here; I myself found that somewhat disappointing. Actual Survivor moments are put to good use here, including a tapioca search and the discovery of a supposedly hot mud pit. If you watch this movie for the girls only, you might be disappointed to find that there is as much time spent on spoofing Survivor as there is. The erotic action is actually somewhat limited in this Seduction Cinema production, but there is a better than average amount of comedy. My particular favorite moment is Esmerelda stopping to light a cigarette while trying to start a fire by banging rocks together. Featuring a heavy-handed satirical take on Survivor, plenty of laughs, and a decent amount of Seduction Cinema girls being Seduction Cinema girls, this low-budget video is not a bad way to waste and hour and a half.
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| 4. Erotic Witch Project Director: John Bacchus | |
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our price: $19.99 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: 6305699194 Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 43938 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (40)
Simply stunning, incredibly erotic, utterly enjoyable, superbly sexy, deliciously tasty and wildly wicked. I was thrilled with every minute of this erotic masterpiece, a true collector's item...I would have paid $100. for it! The three actresses in this film were gorgeous. They exhibited unbridled eroticism...incredibly sexy and talented. The production values were excellent...clear, crisp, steady, sharp and very well lit. The story line was just like the Blair Witch Project. The actresses did a great acting job on this super-sexy spoof. The scenes of the girls 'making it' in the tent were incredible! (Every red-blooded American Male's fantasy come true) I even liked the 'Making-of' section of the video! I very much enjoyed the whole video and look forward to other productions by the same producers. I'm telling all my buddies and recommending that they check-out this masterpiece."
But as an all-girl softcore film, the video delivers quite nicely. The three girls (Katie, Darian, and Victoria) are all attractive. They get naked quite frequently and engage in some excellent twosomes and threesomes. The sex is very explicit and just barely stays within the bounds of softcore. It could have been much better. They should have ditched the monkey and lame humor and used the time for more lesbian sex romps. But I still recommend it.
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| 5. Mistress Frankenstein Director: John Bacchus | |
![]() | list price: $14.98
our price: $14.98 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B00004W5TP Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 28924 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (7)
This movie is just really, really bad. The acting is over the top and back again, there's some kind of laugh track inserted for the servant Igor (seemingly a silly, twisted version of Paul Lynde), all of the incredibly annoying townspeople are named Karl, the horse in the movie is two guys in a costume, the wretched gorilla Kimbo puts in a cameo, Darian is forced to walk and talk like the original Frankenstein's monster, and-with the exception of Miss Caine and Heidi Christine-the featured actresses are hardly worth looking at. I actually considered fast forwarding through some of the scenes. Unfortunately, I could go on and on listing the dumb things that make this movie almost painful to suffer through. Unless you're a huge Darian Caine fan, there's really no reason in the world for you to watch this movie.
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| 6. The Erotic Ghost Director: John Bacchus | |
![]() | list price: $14.98
our price: $14.98 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B000055ZLD Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 57699 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (8)
The Erotic Ghost is one of Seduction Cinema's best overall films, featuring wacky but somehow meaningful comedy alongside the amazingly hot performance of Darian Caine. The behind-the-scenes feature included on the DVD is also well worth watching; it's even funnier than the movie and almost as sexy. The work (and hilarious bloopers) that went into producing the movie's sexiest of scenes is highly entertaining and informative. Cast and crew always have a great time making one of these Bacchus movies, and it shows in the finished product. You also get interviews with Darian Caine and Tammy Parks, as well as a number of trailers for other Seduction Cinema productions. At its core, The Erotic Ghost is just another silly, low-budget erotic movie with no redemptive value whatsoever, but it sure is a lot of fun to watch.
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| 7. The Vampire's Seduction Collector's Edition Director: John Bacchus | |
![]() | list price: $19.99
our price: $19.99 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: 6304848145 Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 53463 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (11)
The plot of this movie is something about a vampire - played for laughs by a really cute Tina Krause, who shows a flair for comedy - named Dracoola, who needs lesbians (and don't they all) and a nerdy loser who she recruits to find some for her. But - and who could have seen this plot twist - he's a Van Helsing! Yes, from the famous vampire-killer lineage. If you can get through the over-long sex scenes (I never thought I'd be saying THAT), this movie is actually pretty funny. The Van Helsing character - played very well by John Paul Fedele and is a kind of cross between Woody Allen and Jerry Lewis' Nutty Professor - has some very funny lines. The script might have been written that way, but he delivers his lines so smoothly that they appear to be ad libbed. I really think this guy shows some talent - but who the hell am I! Also, Zack Snygg (Blood, Bullets and Buffoons) and Debbie Rochon (not enough room to list everything) are very good in their limited screen time. In addition to the comedic elements and the sex (that ever-elusive lesbian vampire sex), there are some unintentionally funny moments also. A young woman goes to a psychotherapist because she is having problems with her boyfriend. She tells the doctor (played by Paige Turner - another great name) that she doesn't feel pretty anymore. Well, there's good reason for that - she's not. But she and the good doctor proceed to "do it" in her office (I've never seen so many women who don't wear underwear) until the pizza boy comes. Then it's something straight out of an old xxx movie - the doctor asks him if he wants cash for the pizza or could she offer him "one of these!" I think you get the picture. The two women and the pizza boy then experience prolonged periods of "getting' it on." Another scene that I found humorous - but I don't know if anyone else will - is a scene in which a supposed-teenage girl is having a friend sleep over at her house. They are talking about boys and the girl's mother enters the room. First of all, the "mother" looks younger than both of the "girls." Then, after setting up the fact that these girls are supposed to be about 14 or 15 years old and virginal, the "mother" proceeds to tell them that boys can be bad and they should kiss each other to see what it's like. The "mother" eventually joins in and when one of the "girls" slips out of her nightie, she has pierced nipples and tattoos. The other "girl" also has tattoos, as well as the "mot her." I don't know, but I found that humorous - maybe it's just me. At the end, the Van Helsing character rids the world of Dracoola in a way that only a movie of this caliber could get away with. Sure, there are certain aspects that scream "crap" - such as the fact that you know Tina's scenes were shot in one day on her lunch break from her real job and edited in later - but it doesn't make any difference. Taken at face value, The Vampire's Seduction is a fun way to kill an hour and a half (including the out-takes after the movie).
I had already decided, after seeing other John Bacchus lemons, not to buy any more of his films. I didn't know that this one was from his stable. They are so formulaic. Excepting as mentioned earlier, this has so little vampirism. It involves primarily a rather ugly and seemingly retarded man spying on a lot of other people having sex. This man just walks into some girls apartment and without her noticing, stands in the bathroom door as she soaps herself. He is bitten once on the arm (that's the extent of the vampirism), and then goes and watches more people. There's the typical John Bacchus feature; a woman in bath/shower soaping herself. Thus the sex scenes aren't really connected to anything. Tina Krause stands outside in the dark waiting for him to report back. She dances around topless a bit, but has very little else to do in this film other then to die pointlessly at the end, having had a few scenes dancing, and being very bored. Even the DVD bonus material (on the flip-side of the disc) is also meaningless as we see Misty Mundae in a long sequence not used in the film "An Erotic Vampire in Paris" which again features a bath scene. She bathes, as the she-Vampire comes in. The she-Vampire spends a long time brushing her hair before getting in the bath too. There's a little bit of breast-fondling, but no vampirism. More shots from some other film are used including a woman standing in front of a window and rubbing herself. There was no point to this either. If you enjoy John Bacchus films you are the most easy to please person on the planet. He enjoys showing women (with inflated breasts) doing lots of dancing and prancing about, and very mild sex scenes, varied only by someone pretending to be a vampire or a demon. And of course, there's got to be a scene showing someone washing herself. It's like a moving version of a ... spread (big boobs, high-heels, big hair).
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| 8. Erotic Witch Project Director: John Bacchus | |
![]() | list price: $19.98
our price: $19.98 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B00003TKEH Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 66259 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (40)
Simply stunning, incredibly erotic, utterly enjoyable, superbly sexy, deliciously tasty and wildly wicked. I was thrilled with every minute of this erotic masterpiece, a true collector's item...I would have paid $100. for it! The three actresses in this film were gorgeous. They exhibited unbridled eroticism...incredibly sexy and talented. The production values were excellent...clear, crisp, steady, sharp and very well lit. The story line was just like the Blair Witch Project. The actresses did a great acting job on this super-sexy spoof. The scenes of the girls 'making it' in the tent were incredible! (Every red-blooded American Male's fantasy come true) I even liked the 'Making-of' section of the video! I very much enjoyed the whole video and look forward to other productions by the same producers. I'm telling all my buddies and recommending that they check-out this masterpiece."
But as an all-girl softcore film, the video delivers quite nicely. The three girls (Katie, Darian, and Victoria) are all attractive. They get naked quite frequently and engage in some excellent twosomes and threesomes. The sex is very explicit and just barely stays within the bounds of softcore. It could have been much better. They should have ditched the monkey and lame humor and used the time for more lesbian sex romps. But I still recommend it.
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| 9. Girl Explores Girl: The Alien Encounter Director: John Bacchus | |
![]() | list price: $19.99
(price subject to change: see help) Asin: 630576266X Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 52206 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
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Description Reviews (7)
Girl Explores Girl does have the distinction of featuring the girls of The Erotic Witch Project, including Katie Keane, the blonde who garnered many fans from her earlier performance but soon stopped working with Surrender Cinema. Keane has a couple of memorable steamy scenes here that should delight her fans. I much prefer the dark and mysterious Darian Caine, who features in three scenes in Girl Explores Girl. After a nice round of exotic dancing, however, her scenes with Victoria Vega are a little on the tame side. Darian still brings plenty of sizzle to the screen, however, and fans of both Caine and Keane would do well to add this film to their collections. The Collector's Edition of this movie includes a bonus documentary called Loving the Alien, interviews with Keane and Ashe, a photo gallery featuring the women of Girl Explores Girl, and trailers for a sampling of other Surrender Cinema productions.
It does what it sets out to do pretty well. The women are attractive and naked. Three of the sex scenes were very good, the others were just okay. It's not going to make any top ten lists, but it is still worth a look.
Storyline: One shouldn't go into a Seduction Cinema movie for the storyline, usually, but in this movie the storyline is so bad that it actually does affect the movie as a whole. 2 aliens come to earth; one becomes an incredibly dorky guy, and the other a hot girl, and sex ensues. That's pretty much it. Little in the movie makes much sense, and the non-sex scenes are downright annoying, so it's best to just skip to the good stuff rather than sitting down with a tub o' popcorn. This is in sharp contrast to Erotic Witch, which is a semi-funny parody that's worth watching all the way through, as well as containing some good girl/girl(/girl) scenes. The girls: Okay, as everyone else has said, Katie Kean- a svelte blonde- is hot. I'm partial to Darian Caine, myself- she's a buxom dark-haired goth-like girl, and Victoria Vega- a brunette- is pretty nice to look at. Unfortunately, Natalia Ashe is horrific looking- her one redeeming virtue is her prehensile tongue. She's overly tanned, overly made-up, and her hair's fried from too much peroxide. The sex scenes: except for the first scene in the film, all of the couplings are girl/girl. Darian with Victoria, and Katie with Natalia. Unfortunately, there is no menage a trois or four-way in the movie, nor do the couples switch. IMO the movie would have been better if there had been interaction between all four girls rather than keeping them as two separate couples. At least it would have been nice to pair Katie with Darian and/or Victoria. The Darian/Victoria scenes are a bit dull. While the actresses are fun to watch, there's no passion (Darian chews gum throughout the whole thing, which is kind of funny); there's little/no kissing, just some half-hearted tongue-play. The shower scene is okay, and the food scenes are probably the hottest between the two. The Katie/Natalia scenes are, surprisingly, much more erotic. There's a definite chemistry between the two, and there's a bit more playing around overall- the scenes actually get quite explicit, which is a nice departure for a softcore film. Still not enough kissing for my taste, but hey... can't win 'em all. DVD extras: Pretty nice- the menus are self-explanatory, and the making-of documentary is fun to watch. The interview with Katie is okay, while the one with Natalia just furthered my distaste for her. I'd like to have seen the DVD be dual-layer, so the extras could be accessed easier on single-sided DVD players. Overall: a decent effort, but not as good as the Erotic Witch Project. Probably still worth the purchase by fans of softcore girl/girl movies, but if it's a toss-up I'd go with EWP first.
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| 10. The Erotic Ghost Collector's Edition VHS Director: John Bacchus | |
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Description THE EROTIC GHOST features red-hot Penthouse Pet TAMMY PARKS and sultry Seduction Cinema star DARIAN CAINE. This haunting and hot-blooded horror show is produced by Michael Beckerman and John Bacchus, the erotic "tag-team" that brought you such favorites as THE EROTIC WITCH PROJECT, VAMPIRE'S SEDUCTION and MISTRESS FRANKENSTEIN. Reviews (1)
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| 11. The Erotic Witch Project Collector's Edition VHS Director: John Bacchus | |
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our price: $29.99 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B000058A0F Catlog: Video Sales Rank: 44958 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
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Description Reviews (2)
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| 12. Erotic Survivor Collector's Edition VHS Director: John Bacchus | |
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Description Reviews (1)
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| 13. The Erotic Witch Project 2: Book of Seduction Collector's VHS Director: John Bacchus | |
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